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Resolutions Part 12: New Food Every Day + Putting it All Together

by:Pox

2012/12/01

I've decided to do a 12 step program this year. Each month, make a new lifestyle change until it all adds up at the end of the year. The key to success is to start small and have a plan. Follow along with me and make your life better! Or at least, more interesting.

Resolution 1: Eat Healthier
Resolution 2: GO TO SLEEP!
Resolution 3: Count Money!
Resolution 4: 59 Seconds
Resolution 5: Follow Politics
Resolution 6: Do Fitocracy Quests
Resolution 7: Get Six Pack
Resolution 8: Shhhh It's a secret
Resolution 9: No More Binging
Resolution 10: Saving Money
Resolution 11: Promote my Dumbass Site!
Resolution 12: A New Food Every Day!

GOAL 11: Promoting my Site

* Difficulty varies on your current lifestyle obviously...

Well the website promoting nonsense might work. Over 100 000 unique visitors for the month of November. That's my best month since I started the site. Still 130 000 short.. so apparently December has to be my best month too... haha I am fucked. Hey, it was a pretty lofty goal for such a shitty site. Also why are people calling this a blog? I made all of this myself. A blog is the website equivalent of a tv dinner, it requires no skills of any kind to create or run. I designed and coded this entire thing from scratch. Mostly.

What's a blog anyway? A website with one or more authors and a comment section? Wow, welcome to the entire fucking internet. Here I thought Youtube was a video site but it turns out it's only a vlog aggregator! And Wikipedia? Boy that's a blog too since it encourages audience participation! And you don't get bloggier than Facebook! That's all it is, an endless string of thoughts with comments about them.

Please bitches, THIS IS A WEBSITE, not a blog. I barely allow discussion because.. who cares? I might remove it eventually. Email me if you want to talk to me, let's all regress to 2000 if possible, when the internet was great and pages had cool stuff like rainbow tiling backgrounds and looping MP3s.

Also, while I'm yelling at you, what's all these complaints about my page being harsh on the eyes? Almost every website today has a pure white background, which is basically like starring at the sun. You aren't complaining then, are you? So next time you see a cool painting or a parrot, you might want to avert your sensible contrast-fearing eyes and stare at the sun for a couple minutes instead. I'm 27 with 20/20 vision. Fools might credit my genetics but I know it's because of wearing sunglasses every time I go out and then almost exclusively reading my website when I get back. Fuck this php editor is bright, time to take a break by reading about the time I didn't eat any solid food for over 20 days.

Anyway, this month I will simply try to eat a different new food every day of the week. Nothing fancy, just any new food that I never bought or ate at a restaurant. On top of that, I will go over every other resolution since the start of the year and try to come as close as I can to achieving it! Except the binging part. Man fuck that, I CANNOT STOP.

I WILL NOT STOP