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MORE BADASS SCULPTURES FROM THE BOTANICAL GARDEN.

by:Pox

2013/010/09

Previously I was at the Montreal Botanical Garden to view their Plant sculptures .

Last time both my phone and my girlfriend's camera died halfway through :,(
We missed a lot of things so I WENT BACK. JUST FOR YOU.

This is a scale model of the main attraction for this year: The Bird tree. It's located in the main entrance hall and I thought I might as well take pictures of it just in case my camera randomly stopped working again.

I bet some kooky jackass artist came up with it and all the plant engineers groaned at the idea of actually having to figure out how to build this.

Won't it be awesome? Bet you can't wait to see the real thing... BUT BEFORE THAT...

GIFT SHOOOOOOOP! For a botanical garden, this gift shop was stacked with all sorts of unrelated science things...

Astronaut ice cream! Yaaaaaaaaah! Who doesn't want to be 5$ for 32grams of dry space food?

They even sold some really cool bonzais, some many decades old! If I had 200$ to spend at a gift shop... and kept windows open in my apartment... I'd buy one. Well probably not. Well...

This is what happens if you plant a pineapple top in some soil. ALso works with severed human heads ( Makes Mormons).

Now behind the pictures of the sculptures you haven't seen last time. This is a beekeeper, he represents hope and freedom and the painful sting of angry insects.

Bark zombie beavers. ZOMBEAVERS!!.

More animals not made of meat. What an offensive display.

Boy look at how fucked up those heads are! Good thing this doesn't represent the artistic pinnacle of a people or else I'd be pretty sad for them.

These are so cool. Spiny boars.

This one is pretty neat but hard to fully appreciate since it's so large and on the water. Maybe they'll learn next time around!

Old bone flute spirit God. Well I mean I think this is a flute, maybe he's fellating a snake.

Look at this dynamic picture I took for you guys! BEW BEW BEW.

PLANTS? SOWING ...MORE PLANTS?

Aboriginal spirit stories are awesome, I'm fairly sure you can make up anything you want and claim it's some kind of Native American legend and people will believe it. Also works in Japan.

M. Bison. The M stood for moss all along.

This one's nice! Right? I'm starting to think this whole thing is aimed towards grandmothers... No dinosaurs anywhere.

Sasquatch. Probably. Look if I have to read one more plaque about endangered animals and how banana republics need our help to stop sucking I will lose it. THIS IS SASQUATCH, PERIOD!! >:(

Chameleon! I saw him right off the bat, he's doing a terrible job.

No idea what that is.

Oh so that's where I live? I see.

This is so meta!

Again this thing is tapering off... just...random nonsense.

This is a pretty cool windmill garden thing. The water is made up of tiny blue glass shards.

You think it's a frog when you see it from the front, but AS IT TURNS OUT IT'S A SALAMANDER!

Hm spoon? Hmmmm.

Pretty sneaky hiding a real car in there.

We almost missed this one! A happy polar bear, frolicking in the water. See how happy they'd be without all that lame ice.

Back inside the visitor center they have a small scale model of the entire garden. It's huge, as you can see, but sadly I was only able to take this shitty picture...:(

Finally we get to the bird tree! Look at how big it is.

As you can see, it's nowhere near as colorful as the scale model led you to believe...

So apparently all of these birds and animals are endangered, mostly because they look too cool and people buy them for their palaces.

This one is more ominous. Hope you get nightmares from it.

Here, at least there should be ONE decent picture in this whole collection of nonsense.

And one last one! Good luck naming all of these trees.

I am happy we went back to complete my picture collection and so I could show this to you. I mean a singular "you" of course. What's up Jerry? How's the wife? I see you at night Jerry. I know where you live.

That does it for the daytime attractions but...gasp... there was another reason I paid the entry fee twice for the garden this year.. SNEAK PEEK: